on impermanence…..

My very first jewelry teacher said she loved to work in metal because it was so “permanent”. But I  do not believe this is true. As a piece of jewelry passes from one generation to the next, absorbing the energy of the wearer, its story changes…gets added on to…morphs. Something that is created while I had something in mind, three generations from now will have a completely different presence. It is a beautiful thing.

She is in the process of leaving me. It was love at first sight( I think it was mutual!). I used to feel my heart would burst with love for this unconditional companion of mine…I have always thought I could not ever imagine being separated from her…life being what it is, that time is coming.

A wise man once said, ” without impermanence, life is not possible”.  While I know in my head, this is true, but my heart, oh, my heart feels differently ! Without impermanence, we would not have the opportunity to see a flower unfold, a beautiful child grow up into a vibrant adult, a conflict find a peaceful resolution…the passage of time and the changes it brings, gives us some of the richest experiences we have in this life, and I am holding tightly to that thought.

Buddhist thought says  we suffer  because we want and need to see things as permanent. I believe if you can make impermanence your friend, it is a relationship that will make just about everything else around it more vibrant and alive and precious. It will keep you from ‘taking things for granted’, and teach us to enjoy and appreciate what we have, right  in the miraculous moment that it flutters in our hearts, for  in truth, that is all there is anyways. Without impermanence, so much is not possible. With it, the colors are brighter, the air smells fresher, the leaves rustle louder, and the proximity of our loved ones is filled with extra warmth.

I feel so  greedy right now and mostly, I hate that feeling within my heart. I feel as if 14 gorgeous years isn’t enough. I feel selfish.I know  that I have had a tremendous gift, but I also know that I have my work cut out for me.I am inviting impermanence out to tea, at my favorite place, and asking her to explain to me, to help me understand, help me be fair, help me be gracious and graceful and brave, all at the same time. I want to become really good friends, not in an effort to make it hurt any less…but so that I can better understand.

On this day, I am wishing you all the peacefulness and beauty life has to offer, and wishes for  you to enjoy all of your gorgeous moments…. namaste, om shanti…

Kerin

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5 Comments

  1. You could not have said it more beautifully, and it made tons of sense and still it made my heart hurt! Courage my dear friend! Thinking of you both! xoxo

  2. You spoke yesterday of metaphor, and today these thoughts you so beautifully outlined are tumbling about in my head. I wish you could pop over for tea, because nothing is so amazing as the sharing of soul-though.

    Hugs from the West,
    – K

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